Yesterday, Hal and the boys and I were at a birthday party and the topic turns to horseback riding. Vicky, the birthday girl, turns to me and says, “Do you ride?”
Me and my big mouth say:
(Why I don’t just say, “Not anymore,” and leave it at that, I’ll never understand. I continue:)
Not everyone has a natural seat, you know, and I have always been very proud of mine. So proud that yesterday, after I told the story, I tried to get someone there to translate the natural seat part to Scott’s girlfriend who does not speak perfect English. Nobody did, saying it wouldn’t really translate. Well, that wouldn’t do… My big mouth instantly disconnected from my pinhead brain and told her:
[Joe TANE-go OO-na SEE-ja nah-tour-AL PA-rah kah-bah-JAIR-ohs.]
Well, Mayra’s eyes lit up in big surprise and the crowd – all of whom speak way better Spanish then me – went crazy. I thought my husband was going to choke up a lung. Because, while I meant to say, “I have a natural seat for horses,” what I actually said was, “I have a natural seat for gentlemen.” Smooth. I’ll never live that one down. At least I tried… that’s worth a few points right there, right? Right!