That about sums up the description of Hal’s
gastointestinal tract, all of it. Frankly, it looks just like his
colon. No, we didn’t try this at home! They don’t sell those fiber
optic cameras to just anyone, you know. Besides, I just like to watch.

we went back to the doctor for Hal’s last preventive medical checkup.
We could have had this done at the same time as the colonoscopy, but
didn’t know it. So back we go.

Let me tell you, Hal is sick of all this medical stuff. He only did this last one because I cried. [NOTE: Please do not try this at home. Remember that I am a professional.]

why not have it? We can afford to have these tests, to at least check
off the obvious cancers: prostrate (they did not offer to let me
watch), ticker, colon, blood tests, markers, x-rays. The gastros were
the only ones left.

As long as I’ve
known Hal, which is only 17 years although he says "seems like forever"
which is really not that nice of a thing to say, he has been a habitual
Alka Seltzer abuser. He coughs a lot after eating, and clears his
throat CONSTANTLY. I finally got him to take Nexium. This has made a
huge difference. And, of course, you can get those little purple pills
without a prescription in Costa Rica for less than a dollar each. In
the U.S., they are $5 each.

with all this ugly gastro evidence, I’m thinking if anyone is going to
have gastro problems, ulcers, thingies, scars, whatever… it’s gotta
be Hal, right?

Wrong. Pink and slippery. A beautiful sight and all for only $88. A bargain like this makes me completely giddy. Life is good at the finca!

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