This is Ryan’s CAT scan and the blue circle is the mass. And, no. It doesn’t look like "nothing." It looks like a big massy scary-looking something. Actually, it’s not nothing. It’s snot. Yeah. SNOT. In all my wild imaginings, snot never made the list. Dr. Arce sure never mentioned it. In Spanish, I think that’s mucosa de nasal [moo-COE-sah day nah-SAL]. Sounds way less disgusting.
Last Friday, Dr. Arce [R-say] was serious as a heart attack looking at the three sheets of x-rays. He kept pointing to the suspicious area, shaking his head. Then he’d read the lab reports again and not say anything at all! Sheesh.
So five days of roller coaster panic over snot. When people say, "Isn’t life funny?" they must mean this.
It was a wild five days.
I started making all kinds of promises to God, then had to admit out loud what God and I both know: I welch on my bets and I don’t keep my promises. Besides, what could I promise to God she doesn’t already have? What a silly notion. "I’ll be a better person, God, I promise." Like I’m not going to try to be a better person everyday anyway?
I am making headway on this. Really. A little slower than I’d like. Ok, a lot slower.
On Saturday, I finally went out to buy some of that MMS that cures everything I read about a few years ago (yeah, I’m one of those). I’ve met a few people here who swear by it. So I called Lewis, the guy who sells it here, and arranged to go to his house to pick it up. He called me back three times in 30 minutes, twice to make sure I had the directions and the third time to ask me to stop by the Fresh Market to pick up a pineapple, some bananas and a watermelon. I almost giggled, but managed to say, "Sure!"
I got his fruits and found his house. Lewis met me at the gate. He’s a buff, bald Little Person with a very healthy complexion. Of course he asked me to pick up fruit… driving here is hard enough. It’d be impossible with a car outfitted for him.
He explained exactly how to use the MMS and made me repeat it all back to him. We had a lovely chat, talked about what brought him here, what brought us here. He is also on the lookout for an income and is working with a buddy of his in the states developing some kind of powered cell that collects energy from the universe. Not solar energy. Energy directly from the universe. You just lift up the lid when you start to run low on power and the power cells draw new energy directly from the universe. I fell in love with Lewis. I hope he makes millions.
Tuesday morning, I called a friend who’s wife had a baby at CIMA a few months ago. There were some complications and I hadn’t spoken to them for a while. It turns out she picked up an infection and had been in the hospital two more months. The infection was necro-something. It’s horrible, like having been burned all over your body: you eventually get all new skin. Recovery will take… a really really long time. I was devastated for them, of course.
And I realized I was counting on our incredible luck not running out. I was counting on the fact that I had plans, and other blog posts to write on other topics. I know that’s all as dumb as making promises to God. But I was. Hearing that something so bad happened to people so good made bad news seem a possibility.
I’m saying a little prayer now for them. I wish there were something I could do.
Hal had lunch with two guys this week, both big in the Conspiracy Theory world. There’s a lot of us here… But one of ’em told us a theory we’d never heard: apparently, many years ago, there was some inbreeding of reptiles and humans creating a reptilian-human bloodline and today those "people" are in positions of power. "You mean like lawyers?" Hal asked. Fortunately, the guy laughed. Then suggested that Tony Blair might be one of these creatures. I can believe it. I mean, take a good look at Tony. See?
So when I say it was a wild five days, I’m talking out of the ball park. Everything is intensified when you are under that kind of stress. Thank God for girlfriends and blogs. That’s how God works: he gives you friends. And thank God the panic comes in short intense waves. Otherwise, you can’t function. I had to keep saying, "It is what it is. We’ll deal with it." And something really bad happening to Ryan was simply out of the question.
Panic over a big wad of snot. I might be embarrassed but I’m too relieved. "It’s all good," as Ryan likes to say.
“both big in the Conspiracy Theory world. There’s a lot of us here… But one of ’em told us a theory we’d never heard: apparently, many years ago, there was some inbreeding of reptiles and humans creating a reptilian-human bloodline and today those “people” are in positions of power.”
note to self, the guys from Montana were not crazy, actually they sound like geniouses right now…..I need guns…..and shotguns…..we have been invaded by crazy Gringos…that’s it…they were expelled because they knew that a) they had to keep paying taxes b) they were crazy
yes yes …..and we dumbasses that we are ……..we ‘welcome them’…..of course…..they get a bit pissy because of the gringo prices but well….THEY ARE REPTILES…..OBVIOUSLY THEY HAVE STRONGER EMOTIONS AND LITTLE REMORSE……
ok so two shotguns, is that enough? of course not….these reptiles-humans (of course….no wonder they NOW don’t believe on evolution..) probably have M-16 machine guns…..ummm
We don’t need M-16s – we have claws and sharp teeth. And your bullets are useless. Bullets don’t penetrate reptile skin. Actually, the scariest thing you said was the “little remorse.” That’s why politicians are so scary…
Snots the problem. I am so glad that your family is OK Sally. Sherrie and I will pray for continued luck for you guys. I can’t wait to see you sing again.
Pura Vida, Scot
shoot……this is making too much sense
“we have claws and sharp teeth.”……….and you like dentists here because they are affordable 😉
I am so happy that Ryan is fine. I had prayed for you and your family. Loved the stuff on your Mom. It was so funny. And on that day I really needed a good laugh……
I’m so relieved to hear your good news. We just don’t know how fortunate we are until we are tested. Much love to you and your beautiful family. -t
Yay for snot! 🙂 Told ya it would be okay; I know things. 🙂
Hugs to you all!
Glad to hear Ryan’s problem ‘snot anything major. Tell him to start picking his nose more. Or at least deeper. 🙂
One more thing. Remember when parents could threaten to embarrass their grown kids by showing baby photos of them naked on the bear-skin rug or in the bathtub? Now it’s come to “Well, here’s little Ryan’s nasal cavity CAT scan. Guess what THAT is!”
Kids today don’t have a chance! 🙂
one thing, mucosa nasal might be the ‘scientific term found in medical literature’
but in plain Spanish that is ‘mocos’
I didnt say it but I am also glad he is fine, does that fine he is not going to need surgery ?
Thank you, for the good wishes and the exact Spanish word for snot. He does need surgery, mid-October, to remove his adenoids, fix his deviated septum (his right nostril is practically closed – no wonder he can’t breathe!) And vacuum out the mocos. Only $3200 at Clinica Católica… I am not complaining. Los norteamericanos no lo creen! (I think I said, “Those North Americans wouldn’t believe it!)
well this is going to sound silly but………..
since you are going to be on my side of the city……there is an good italian restaurant (I think the food is great) right next to the parking lot of Clinica Catolica, its on a corner . its called Spaghetti House.
I know you are going to be scared shitless but……..even the scared need to have good food 🙂
Thank you! I never thought I’d be too scared to eat… but I lost about four pounds in five days last weekend. Need to build up my strenght, Spaghetti House sounds like just the place!
Whew, I am so glad to hear it’s just a majorly stuffy nose! I was worried right along with everyone else here. I bet he’ll be breathing so much better after the surgery.