Who adores me.
Meet Clemenza. That’s Capo Clemenza to you. He’s a valley bulldog. Oops: Valley Bulldog, a pretend purebred. As one guy put it on a bulldog forum: "Even though you mixed two purebreds, you still gotta mutt." Clemenza doesn’t care. Nor do we.

He squats to pee and is timid around new people (like us) for the first few minutes. Other than that, he’s completely butch. And a magnificent slobberer. I am completely covered in slobber. He loves to play. I bet one of us could throw one of those disgusting slobber covered rubber toys all day long and he’d chase it every time.

And talk about being built like a brick s–thouse, he’s 60 pounds of hard muscle. He ran into me when I had one of the rubber toys in my hand (actually just my thumb and forefinger were touching it) and knocked me down. Then covered me with more slobber. Yessir, we are having some fun now.

So whatever possessed me? I don’t know. It just seemed like the right thing to do at this moment. We’ve been dying to have a dog. Mom has two dogs, both rescues: Boo, a black pitbull puppy, female, the goofiest thing you ever had the pleasure to know. And Mango, a 6 or 7 year old 80lb pitbull lab mix, female, a sweetheart who sings with me. My family says she’s the better singer.

Mom’s sending Boo later this month and will bring Mango with her when she comes in April. So we were already dog ready and waiting… then on the Costa Rica Living group, a guy wrote that he had a dog needed a home. The dog, Clemenza, was a Valley Bulldog: half boxer, half English Bulldog. Uncle Brian has always wanted an English Bulldog and we desperately miss Uncle Brian and Ain’t Peggy. If they won’t come to visit us, maybe they’ll come to visit the dog.

We actually paid money for this dog: $200. They were asking $600 which in the real world is real money. I offered $200, knowing Jal would KILL ME when I told him I wanted to actually BUY a dog. There are a million dogs here running around, all free. But I waited till the right moment (you know what I’m talkin’ about) and he caved.

Besides, we got a lot for our $200. First of all, there’s Clemenza, the Valley Bulldog, 60 pounds of love. Then we got this great crate, a leash, collar, big rubbermaid container for his food, two stainless bowls, several big rubber toys that I now know were covered in dried slobber.

And the icing on the cake? A free subscription to our local dog whisperer’s website: Dog Problems.com. Adam, the dog whisperer, raised Clemenza from a puppy for a client, so Clemenza has a lot of training under his belt. Collar. (Clemenza’s previous owner got a job in Dubai for five years and couldn’t take Clemenza.)
Adam’s website has videos, articles, ebooks, tons of info and dog whispering tips and tricks. I could use that with this little furrball. Not to mention with Boo! Boo is housebroken, but still a wild thang.

We are very excited and happy to have Clemenza. Did I mention his magnificent farts? Now we all have someone to blame. The only thing that concerns me is, you know how people are always saying owners start to look like their dogs? Precious as Clemenza is, that would be a major bummer.