So far, so good. The first day, she spent mostly in bed, catching up on sleep. Now she’s watching her political shows* and bringing my plants back to life. Whenever I buy a plant, Hal likes to suggest I kill it in the store rather than bring it home and torture it to death. He gets such a kick out of himself.
My mother, on the other hand, has a green thumb. I think it’s because she likes plants and animals more than she likes people. She has one of those t-shirts that says “plants and animals died to make room for your fat ass.” Anyway, she spent half an hour making up a special meal (30% protein, 30% starch… I don’t know, she recited the recipe to me) for the dogs, cooking, boiling, serving it up, watching them eat, then cleaning up the mess. So far, she’s made me a cup of coffee…
OK, just kidding. I know she’ll be cooking up a storm pretty soon, even for the people who live here. After her plants and animals, she likes her grandchildren best. Then Hal. Then me. I’m pretty sure I make the list. She’s happy to be here, we are happy to have her. There will be pictures as soon as she is rested and has on her lipstick. So far, so good.
*My mom is as far left as you can get without falling off the world. If she were a color, she’d be teal. When I first started dating Hal in 1989, Libertarian wasn’t really a household term, nobody knew what it was, so everyone thought I was dating – OHYMYGOD – a Republican. (Actually, my father was a Republican, but he is no longer with us and is not here to defend himself.) I was practically disowned. Hal’s and Mom’s first political “discussion” almost came to blows. Not good. Today, after only 18 years, they are great buddies. Surprisingly, they find they have many things in common. Just not everything.** Yet.
**For example, Mom says “Plants and animals died to make room for your fat ass” like it’s a bad thing. Hal says that’s why they exist.